"While I'm Waiting," John Waller

Love the movie and love the song!

First date, revisited.

Today marks 6 months since my first date with Sean. The beautiful work that God has done since that night brings me gratefully to my knees. I feel confident of where He is leading us but no matter where this relationship goes God has used it to grow me tremendously. Through God's grace, Sean is an incredible man and on the day this picture was taken I had no idea that a man like this existed. I continue to pray that God will bless me with the opportunity to love Sean for the rest of my life to His glory.

(Thanks to Drew, I have a picture to remember that night forever.
Note: It took me an entire week to find a shirt to wear!)

Dios mediante

We all have desires. It is not inherently wrong to have them as long as what you're pursuing is not a sin and your desire is not covetous. There is a specific way we are called to desire things though. When we want things, when we pray for things, when we go after things we must remember that our desires are subject above all to God's will.

We must always be aware of this and willing to submit to this. When we do not obtain our desires we must remember that this is God's will for us and we must be joyous. We can rest assured that even when something has not gone the way we have hoped it to, it has without a doubt gone the way our Sovereign Lord ordained. In accepting that "we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." (Romans 8:28)

It is good to want a husband and children. It is good to want health for ourselves and those we love. It is good to be joyous if God gives us these things but it is also good and vital to be joyous if He does not.

If you desire a husband and children but God keeps you single praise His name, for being single is for your good and His glory. If you lose someone you love to cancer even this is God's will and even this will be for good. "As for you, you meant evil against me but God meant it for good." (Genesis 50:20) If you want to be healthy to serve God and bring Him glory but you remain ill or in pain then this is how He wants you to bring Him glory. These incredibly difficult examples make the ones we face daily seem more surmountable. The most wonderful thing about all of this is knowing that the God who wills is also the God who gives the grace necessary to be joyous in these things.

Dios mediante. God willing.

"Beautiful Letdown," Switchfoot

Love this song. I'm glad I can say that I don't belong here, my home is in Heaven with my Savior!

Caging the Lion

In our sin we trust our own abilities
As though we can fight against evil
Standing unarmed in this age
We put the Lion in a cage

In our self-exalting minds we think
I will not be greedy, I will tell no lie
I can do no harm, how great I will be
What power we invest in I, when there is no power in me

And the Lion sits in His cage, gentle as a Lamb
Not because He cannot come out
But because we fail to call on His name
Even as we are burned in the flame

Do not be confused, when I say there is no power in I
I mean there is also no power in you
Evil gives confidence, fills with pride
Evil will afford you to buy into the lies

And still we cage the Lion, deaf to His mighty roar
He alone can save us, only by His strength
Yet our eyes blind with love of man
Do not see the one who holds us in His hands

If we fail to open the cage, to come fearfully to His throne
We will succomb to evil, belonging to our sins
If we do not seek the One who is both Lion and Lamb
Evil will devour us in the place we try to stand

"By Your Side," Tenth Avenue North

The lyrics to this song are so powerful and so true! I think it's a great song for this week.

And this one is just an encouragement for someone I know. (wink, wink) Though that person probably won't see it! The quality of this video isn't great but that's okay.

Romans 8:26-27

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And He who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will.

I am always amazed at how God points me right to the verse or passage I most need. What comfort there is in these promises as I struggle with knowing what to pray. My Spirit is groaning even if my mind cannot find the words. Praise His Holy Name!

When my walk is weak

When my walk with Christ is weak, everything suffers. School, mothering, girlfriend-ing (that's right, I made that word up), praying, you name it. It's one big snowball effect as things just add up. I feel...well, everything, a little bit of every emotion out there.

My walk has been weak for the past 2 weeks or so. Some days it improves but then it seems I'm down again. I feel so far from Christ but my heart and Spirit know that He is with me. It has been especially difficult because I see all the good God is continuing to do in my life and I don't feel like I am praising Him enough. I am so grateful that our salvation and His mercies are not dependent on our works. He has showed me that often in the past 2 weeks. If this were not the case I would be (we all would be) headed for the fires of hell.

I want to lock myself in a room and just read the Bible, pray and worship. I think that is what I will try to do tonight when the girls have been picked up and Aiden is asleep. Hopefully I will be able to do some journaling, I haven't been able to write in over 2 weeks, not for a lack of time but for a lack of words. For me, not being able to write, not having words to put in my journal is a sure sign of trouble.

I am going to the cross, my only comfort, my only delight, my Lord and Savior.

"Give me Jesus," Jeremy Camp

I am starting a new theme on the blog, "Song of the week." It will be whatever song I cannot get out of my head for that particular week. All the cool blogs have themes so I figured I should have at least one. Enjoy!

My experiment

For the past four weeks I have been covertly [read: unintentionally] conducting an experiment. Hopefully today was the last day of the experiment for a while. In four weeks, Aiden and I have taken 3 trips to his pediatrician in Edina. Edina is a pretty affluent suburb of Minneapolis and therefore was the perfect site for this experiment. On each of the visits I have been observing the way cars are parked in the parking lot.

Hypothesis:
I left our first visit with my hypothesis, "The richer you are (or the more expensive car you drive), the worse you are at parking." Aiden left with a diagnosis of walking pneumonia.
Data:
Trip #2 confirmed my suspicions as Aiden and I attempted to walk between two cars that were parked completely crooked, one was a Range Rover and one was a Saab. That trip Aiden came home with a bill of good health and a few "owwies" from shots. Today was (again, I say hopefully) the culmination of my extensive scientific work on the subject of poor parking. I parked in front of a Cadillac that was over the line and crooked. Next to the Cadillac was a brand-new shiny Jeep, parked crooked. Now, don't get me wrong, when I say crooked I don't mean just a little bit, I mean "have you been drinking?"-crooked. Aiden departed this time with a diagnosis of an ear infection.
Conclusion:
Needless to say I think my hypothesis has been proven. Now the question remains, are they bad at parking because they truly lack the ability/eyesight to park straight or is it just that they don't think they have to park within the lines?