When my walk is weak

When my walk with Christ is weak, everything suffers. School, mothering, girlfriend-ing (that's right, I made that word up), praying, you name it. It's one big snowball effect as things just add up. I feel...well, everything, a little bit of every emotion out there.

My walk has been weak for the past 2 weeks or so. Some days it improves but then it seems I'm down again. I feel so far from Christ but my heart and Spirit know that He is with me. It has been especially difficult because I see all the good God is continuing to do in my life and I don't feel like I am praising Him enough. I am so grateful that our salvation and His mercies are not dependent on our works. He has showed me that often in the past 2 weeks. If this were not the case I would be (we all would be) headed for the fires of hell.

I want to lock myself in a room and just read the Bible, pray and worship. I think that is what I will try to do tonight when the girls have been picked up and Aiden is asleep. Hopefully I will be able to do some journaling, I haven't been able to write in over 2 weeks, not for a lack of time but for a lack of words. For me, not being able to write, not having words to put in my journal is a sure sign of trouble.

I am going to the cross, my only comfort, my only delight, my Lord and Savior.