Confessions and Praise

I have to start this post with a confession. The last couple of weeks have been hard for me. I've really been struggling with anxiety and little faith. My time in the Word has been pathetic and it shows! I've allowed myself to get low and stay there; throwing myself a pity party for one.

Now, that's all ugly stuff that is hard for me to admit and even harder for me to put on this blog. My self-preservation instincts tell me that I should erase that whole thing but it's not about preserving myself, it's about glorifying God! So, I give you the ugliness that is my sinful self in order for you to see the beauty of the work that God has been doing.

One of the things I have been anxious about is the cost of having a baby. (Babies require a lot of things from diapers to strollers and on and on.) As I have been needlessly concerned about this, God saw fit to show me His faithfullness in a couple of ways:

• After researching prices, quality, etc. on car seat travel systems, I finally found one but it was going to be expensive. Sean's parents gave us a gift of money to go towards the cost of the travel system. My very intelligent husband suggested that I look on Craigslist to see if we could find a travel system that way. I was skeptical but gave it a shot anyway. We found a perfect travel system and guess what? The cost was exactly the same amount as the gift from Sean's parents! Wow! We saved over $100 and got a great car seat and stroller for our little girl!

• When baby comes (which will hopefully be soon!) Sean is planning to take some time off. Unfortunately, he doesn't have paid vacation with his current job, so taking time off means lost income. Obviously, it is more important for him to be there for our daughter's birth so he has been planning to take the time off no matter what. Well, my dad recently gave us a gift of money for the baby's coming. The amount is exactly what we will be "losing" when Sean takes the time off. What amazes me is that my dad had no idea that we had this need but God sure did!
  

Some other ways God has been faithfully showing me His glory and power:

• Aiden has officially become a daddy's boy! (Boys normally make this switch around the age of 18 months but Aiden was 19 months old when he first meet his daddy.) The timing on this couldn't be more perfect since I will be very busy with a new baby and unable to give him as much attention as he is accustomed to.

• We were finally able to complete and submit our petition for adoption and are now just waiting for a court date to be scheduled! I really wanted to get this submitted before baby arrived to avoid putting it off any longer!

I hope that this post will encourage you and remind you that our God is ever faithful, powerful, merciful and loving! Even as I have been weak, lofty and doubtful He has covered me with His love and is pulling me out of the hole I dug for myself and threw myself in!